Wednesday, September 10, 2014

You Watch the World Complain. but You do it Anyway

Not having batteries for the scale is driving me nuts!!
I'm losing weight though, I can feel it :)
The stress of school is killing my appetite, and I love it
117 is going to be mine...

Friday, September 5, 2014


I watch House, and I worry about dying like those people,
Organs pulsing,
Blood gushing out.
I really don't want to end up like them.

That's the thing though. 
Right when I think I think of being like them, I am comforted.
I'm not like them, so I can't end up like them.
I really don't think I'm like anyone.
I feel like if they cut me open.they'd be in for a surprise.
Like i'd be arranged differently, missing something, or maybe having something extra...

Maybe there's nothing in there and it's all just an illusion.
I find myself detaching from the situation a lot lately, and this isn't like me.
Usually, I'm a little too excitable and emotional about things.
Lately though, it's like an out of body experience.

I get stressed out, so i step out of myself and just stare in pity at her.
The moment I feel pain, I just remove myself from it, and don't allow myself to feel it.
It really is a perplexing situation.

Maybe it's from the restricting...

Anyone else ever feel this way?