tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-67651513393928628102024-03-05T14:47:35.813-06:00 **A Petal in the Wind**Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.comBlogger586125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-39099213947749571372015-05-26T20:15:00.001-05:002015-05-26T20:15:51.683-05:00L is for...<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I know that love exists</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I feel it in the fluttering ache in my chest</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">In the fruitless flap of the butterfly's wings</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">In that deep, hollow chasm</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Exactly where my heart should be</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I shoot them down one by one</span>Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-75302274455752624972015-03-15T15:37:00.003-05:002015-03-15T15:37:34.974-05:00Hello AllHey there...<br />
<br />
Life has been a pain.<br />
I'm sure you all understand that.<br />
<br />
I have been hanging out at 123 lbs. for quite a while now<br />
I want to be at 117<br />
This is my goal for now.<br />
<br />
I will post as soon as I can.<br />
I will also add new pics.<br />
<br />
How are you all?Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-58487697198766212062015-02-11T20:32:00.000-06:002015-02-11T20:32:01.993-06:00So Yeah...School has been a bitch lately.<br />
I will update tomorrow when I have more energy.<br />
Sorry about that...Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-66082312002959317192015-01-28T13:47:00.005-06:002015-01-28T13:48:00.393-06:00A Question I Need Answered<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I need opinions here people. and I will give my answer later.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">The question is, </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">"In your experience, are eating disorders a choice, or a disease?"</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">This question has been plaguing my mind lately...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Please leave comments below!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">XoXo</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Sunshine</span></div>
Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-10009245550976201452015-01-21T11:31:00.000-06:002015-01-21T11:31:26.740-06:00Blame it on Blogger + Lots of New Photos!!Hello Everyone!!<br />
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<span style="text-align: center;">Did You miss me?</span><br />
<br />
I apologize for my long absence.<br />
I was not able to log into my blog for the longest time, and I finally have access to it again!!<br />
I can not believe it has been over 2 months!<br />
<br />
I have missed you all so much it is crazy!<br />
I promise to post at least weekly from here on out :)<br />
(but of course, life will inevitably get in the way)<br />
<br />
I am between classes right now, so I will have to make this quick.<br />
<br />
Updates:<br />
I am still rocking the thigh gap daily :) It never hides from me now lol<br />
<br />
I am still only weighing in on Sunday mornings<br />
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I find that this helps to keeps me from getting obsessive and disappointed, which ultimately leads to binging and failure. Sunday night is family dinner, which is always something heavy, so not weighing in on Monday and Tuesday is probably a very good thing for me. Also, i will have a whole week to correct for the mistakes of Sunday evening before I have to weigh in again :)<br />
<br />
My weight now sits between 120 and 123<br />
I feel like that is an amazing thing, but also, I can not afford to get complacent<br />
As such, I am going to be fasting for 3 days between tonight at midnight, and Sunday evening at family dinner<br />
Does anyone want to join??<br />
<br />
It seems like in my absence, my blog has mostly turned into a recruiting ground for pro-ana buddies,<br />
and this is fine, but fair warning, if you post your age, and you are super young, I might delete your contact information. I'm not trying to judge, but there is just something about 12 and 13 year-old girls getting their start with and eating disorder from my blog that kind gives me goosebumps...<br />
<br />
Anywho... I would love to know how everyone is doing and any exciting updates??<br />
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I will be checking in on blogs tonight after class, and commenting as I can<br />
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<br /><3 Sunshine</div>
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P.S. I'm not sure if I've posted any of these pics before, but there are some recent ones and some brand new ones so you all can see my progress :)</div>
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Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-1306266094553865032014-11-18T10:53:00.000-06:002014-11-18T10:53:07.885-06:00Vicious Cycle<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><b>"I eat because I'm unhappy, and I'm unhappy because I eat."</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><b>I'm starting to get that dark eyes, exhausted, starving artist look. I only weigh in once a week now, but the numbers hold steady. Hovering just a hair above "underweight." I've never been so small for so long. Idk when I last weighed in above 125. It's scary how easy this is all becoming.</b></span></div>
Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-89164170192309920492014-11-04T13:22:00.003-06:002014-11-04T13:22:42.269-06:00Sitting Pretty<div style="text-align: center;">
Have you all noticed a shift in your set weight since all the Ana madness ensued?</div>
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Back before all of this, in my Senior year of high school, my weigh would sit between 135-140 </div>
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if I wasn't consciously trying to manage it.</div>
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Once college happened, and I became obsessed with the numbers </div>
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133 was an amazing number, and anything above 137 was absolutely disgusting</div>
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The I dropped into the 130-135 range</div>
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and down </div>
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and down</div>
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and down</div>
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Now my weight naturally sits between 123 and 127 without me even trying to maintain</div>
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I guess my habits have changed and i just didn't notice</div>
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If I start to approach anything resembling 130, I panic and starve</div>
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last time I weighed, I was 123.6</div>
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<br /></div>
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I don't look any different, but i always feel like I can feel the bones in my face protruding</div>
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You can't possibly lose 14% of your body weight and not notice</div>
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idk, though...</div>
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I feel like I look the exact same, </div>
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but with a high weigh of 143, those 20 lbs obviously went somewhere...</div>
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Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-56670666285988476132014-10-29T11:47:00.002-05:002014-11-03T10:41:29.413-06:00Sorry!<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I am fully aware that I, "Disappeared without warning." </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I really appreciate all of the concerned emails</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> <3 <3 <3 </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">At least someone cares!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's just been crazy chaotic around here lately, like always. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's no excuse, and I'm very sorry about that. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My new resolution is to post at minimum once per week. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's not fair to leave you all hanging. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I just finished that lovely time of month, so a fast is needed :) </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My eating patterns always go to shit this time of month.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> I need to rebalance things. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">SOOOO the plan is to fast Thursday- Sunday evening. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Who wants to join me??</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><3 Sunshine</span></div>
Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-30508659269769747922014-10-01T15:02:00.000-05:002014-10-01T15:02:58.574-05:00Progress Pics and a Fast, What Could be Better?<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Hello All!!!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sorry it's been so long since my last post, school has me by the throat right now.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I really don't have appropriate time for a proper post now, but I wanted to post these pics for you all , and announce that I'll be fasting Midnight tonight through Sunday at 8 AM, when I will weigh myself.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Does anyone wish to join me?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It is so much easier to have support through this :)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Progress: I can see my hip bones curving up and around the back now. Can you all see it too? :)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><3 Sunshine</span></div>
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Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-71463304387037246562014-09-10T21:12:00.000-05:002014-09-10T21:12:08.302-05:00You Watch the World Complain. but You do it AnywayNot having batteries for the scale is driving me nuts!!<br />
I'm losing weight though, I can feel it :)<br />
The stress of school is killing my appetite, and I love it<br />
117 is going to be mine...Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-49547087738371599042014-09-05T02:17:00.001-05:002014-09-05T02:17:20.533-05:00Disconnect<div style="text-align: left;">
I watch House, and I worry about dying like those people,</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Organs pulsing,</div>
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Blood gushing out.</div>
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I really don't want to end up like them.</div>
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<br /></div>
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That's the thing though. </div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Right when I think I think of being like them, I am comforted.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I'm not like them, so I can't end up like them.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I really don't think I'm like anyone.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I feel like if they cut me open.they'd be in for a surprise.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Like i'd be arranged differently, missing something, or maybe having something extra...</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Maybe there's nothing in there and it's all just an illusion.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I find myself detaching from the situation a lot lately, and this isn't like me.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Usually, I'm a little too excitable and emotional about things.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Lately though, it's like an out of body experience.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I get stressed out, so i step out of myself and just stare in pity at her.</div>
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The moment I feel pain, I just remove myself from it, and don't allow myself to feel it.</div>
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It really is a perplexing situation.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Maybe it's from the restricting...</div>
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<br /></div>
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Anyone else ever feel this way?</div>
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<br /></div>
Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-29539738756567763792014-08-27T11:02:00.003-05:002014-08-27T11:02:59.483-05:00Stress= Relief<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Hello beautiful readers!!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">How are you all doing on this glorious day?</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I'm typing this post on my laptop while riding an exercise bike at the gym, and I'm getting some funny looks.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">That's ok though, at least I'm not getting as many looks as the sweaty guy in short shorts on the treadmill singing Adele between gasps of air. He's actually very entertaining to watch, because you can tell his doesn't give two shits about the people staring. Anyways...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Wow, so my classes this semester are all very reading intensive. I have to read basically a chapter or two each week, about 30 pages per chapter, for each class, and make chapter outlines. So what is that, like 300 pages each week? Yikes! Good thing my Psych Stat book has lots of pictures, practice problems, charts, and diagrams lol That basically cuts the actual text I'm reading in half.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I am just so absorbed with homework, and it's only day 3.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I just wish my f'ing planner would arrive, or at least ship! lol Stupid Lilly Pulitzer</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">The good thing is, the stress takes away any appetite I have, or maybe it's all the coffee...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Either way, I'm loving it!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I've probably had about 2000 calories the past 3 days, and I've been working out more at home to "relieve the stress" Translation: make my cals as negative as possible for the day.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Oh, and my bf is just so understanding :) </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">"I'm hungry!"</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">"Here, let me make you dinner, and I'll get something once I finish my work. I don't want to break my concentration"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">" You're such a good girlfriend!"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">The beast gets fed, and he loves watching me do school work. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">He said it makes him proud. Dinner and a show lol</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I won't weigh in until Sunday morning, but expect great news!!</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I can see more bones than ever :)</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">A little girl on my gymnastics team pointed out the fact that you could see where my spine sticks out because of the line of sweat dots going down the back of my shirt during warm up lol</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">For all you college students, have you started class yet?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">How are things going?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><3 Sunshine</span></div>
<br />Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-61842548998048346562014-08-20T11:00:00.002-05:002014-08-20T11:00:54.507-05:00A Sunny Spot<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I feel like such a nerd, but I love back to school time!! </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Classes start on Monday!My classes actually sound really interesting this semester. Probably because this time around, they actually apply to my specific major!!</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">English Composition</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Advanced Spanish </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"> Multicultural Psychology</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"> Understanding Statistical Inferences in Psychology</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">History and Systems of Psychology</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"> I went to school yesterday, met with my academic adviser, and finalized my schedule for the semester. I also officially declared my major! So excited about this :) </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I took a competency exam yesterday and I tested out of trigonometry, pre-calculus, and calculus!!! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I'm really good at math, I just don't enjoy all of the busy work. What a relief that I'm done with math! </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I just can't sit through those boring lessons. I will lose interest and distract others :) Usually with loud talking and inappropriate comments about the professor which sends my neighbors into hysterical fits of laughter. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Especially if they were up late the night before, "studying." </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Sleep deprivation works wonders on how well my jokes are received by those around me. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Less sleep= louder, more prolonged laughing</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">How's that for some math?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Another beautiful thing about this time of year is Sweater weather!! AH I'm so excited for boots, scarves and big over sized sweaters. Oh and tights under skirts! And hats and gloves! I definitely need to get a nice pair of gloves and a felt hat this year :D Ok, Ok, I think I might have pre-fall fever :)</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I'm going to go catch some final summer rays</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">What's your favorite thing about this time of year?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><3 Sunshine</span></div>
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Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-10598662902374065882014-08-15T14:28:00.001-05:002014-08-15T14:28:37.300-05:00That's What he Said...<div style="text-align: center;">
" Of course you're small. Honestly, if you were any smaller, I'd be mad."</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB5ExM9Ma6zrk8ckWh1nJWMrppG0Nhci6Cdx3xU4VTnx0HhJiwkP8ncpfYFGj3UJ4y2tW3y0R68L3Nzcu9lFhaTfLbNDI6YE5RM_fQ-jJMVCXVNy_C-BDtm8J8EVH_KartCEEmxXyHaY2i/s1600/August3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB5ExM9Ma6zrk8ckWh1nJWMrppG0Nhci6Cdx3xU4VTnx0HhJiwkP8ncpfYFGj3UJ4y2tW3y0R68L3Nzcu9lFhaTfLbNDI6YE5RM_fQ-jJMVCXVNy_C-BDtm8J8EVH_KartCEEmxXyHaY2i/s1600/August3.jpg" height="320" width="303" /></a></div>
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* * *</div>
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Prepare to be pissed</div>
Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-73441062124115717672014-08-10T01:34:00.004-05:002014-08-10T01:34:40.599-05:00Paleolithic<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>Hello lovely readers! I have a question for you...</i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>Has anyone tried the paleo diet?</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>I feel like it will be a good way to get to my ugw.</i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>So tell me, does it work?</i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>How much weight did you lose on it in how much time?</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>Let me know <3</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKxsI1O6ZBeTx3HjflLCHlUEF9oBI3QoUqnkNrJq91RIeKpQsdwrDfEzmzoS9ut2ni0RD_Yy3cGKVtpGWFx5h_mYwNkKdmfnnxkZmnwfJCJ7K97fUjB98U3pF-_99-TRic7IAmkFNKHSy6/s1600/red+pants.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKxsI1O6ZBeTx3HjflLCHlUEF9oBI3QoUqnkNrJq91RIeKpQsdwrDfEzmzoS9ut2ni0RD_Yy3cGKVtpGWFx5h_mYwNkKdmfnnxkZmnwfJCJ7K97fUjB98U3pF-_99-TRic7IAmkFNKHSy6/s1600/red+pants.jpg" height="320" width="240" /></i></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><i>** These pants used to be so tight I had to suck in to close them! Now they won't stay up !**</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><i><b> :) <u>US size 4</u></b></i></span></div>
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<br />Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-30241676211754419152014-08-07T14:24:00.001-05:002014-08-07T14:25:16.064-05:00Reposting My Pics<div style="text-align: center;">
Hello! </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
So I posted some updated pics a few days ago, and apparently, they don't show up! D: (cue dramatic music! Dun, Dun,Dun!)</div>
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<br /></div>
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0.o Anyways...</div>
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Here they are again! Enjoy!!</div>
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<3 Sunshine<br />
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<div>
<b><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Meet me at the glass</span></b></div>
<div>
<b><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">hand reaching, eyes search for truth</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">my outside looks in</span></b></div>
</div>
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<br />Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-4909763606575543592014-08-07T11:27:00.000-05:002014-08-07T11:27:05.177-05:00Question...<div style="text-align: center;">
Can you all see the pictures on my last post? I received an email from someone who could not see the pictures, but I can see them fine when I look at my page.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Let me know, please :)</div>
Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-37209087429223929282014-08-06T09:57:00.000-05:002014-08-06T09:57:12.584-05:00Reflection<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Meet me at the glass</span></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">hand reaching, eyes search for truth</span></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">my outside looks in</span></b></div>
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<img src="http://mail.aol.com/38683-216/aol-6/en-us/mail/get-attachment.aspx?uid=28262082&folder=NewMail&partId=3" height="240" width="320" /></div>
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<img src="http://mail.aol.com/38683-216/aol-6/en-us/mail/get-attachment.aspx?uid=28262081&folder=NewMail&partId=3" height="240" width="320" /></div>
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I thought you all could use some more dramatic poetry and selfy pics ;)</div>
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Enjoy, lovlies <3</div>
Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-61808167027135625162014-07-31T14:54:00.001-05:002014-07-31T14:54:23.123-05:00Time to Start This Again<div style="background-color: #b6cad4; color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18.200000762939453px; text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-size: medium;">Each day of the week will have a theme:</span></b></div>
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<b>Meager Meatless Mondays=</b></div>
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No meat, no dairy and no bread today. Try to fill up on around <b>1000</b> calories of pure, unrefined fruit and vegetables. I know, its a lot of calories, and a lot of food, but it will do wonders for your body. Try to incorporate an ab workout today. I'll post my personal workout on this day :)</div>
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<b>Tiny Tummy Tuesday=</b></div>
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Today is all about debloating the tummy. Aim for 8 glasses of lemon water to flush out toxins and get rid of excess water. Try to make today as low as possible on carbs. <b>800</b> cal or less of pure protein; eggs, meat, fish, nuts, legumes, soy. Whatever floats your boat :) I'll post an exercise challenge each Tuesday.</div>
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<b>No Worries Wednesday=</b></div>
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Today is kind of a free day. Eat whatever clean foods you want, but stay under <b>1200!</b>Absolutely no junk food, candy, cakes, chips, etc. Another abs workout day!</div>
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<b>Thinking Thin Thursday=</b></div>
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Cut carbs and calories today. The maximum is <b>500 </b>calories. Try to limit the carbs to those found in whole fruits and veg. Make sure to get some nice protein as well. Today is a last chance to cut out weight before the weigh in tomorrow morning! Also, cutting way back will help with fasting tomorrow. </div>
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<b>Fasting Friday=</b></div>
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It's weigh day!!! Get your skinny ass up on the scale and report your wonderful loss on my weigh in post. Only water/tea/coffee today. No sweeteners. Trust me on this one. Just take a day each week to let your boy heal and detox. Evaluate your loss this week. No hard exercise today. </div>
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<b>Soup and Smoothie Saturday=</b></div>
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If you made it through the fast, you haven't had real food since Wednesday. You don't want to shock your system too badly with a sudden belly full of food. Let's have around <b>900</b> cal of healthy soup and smoothies. Be gentle on your body. Work those abs out today!!</div>
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<b>Funday Sunday!=</b></div>
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This is family dinner day for me, so I can't be too restrictive. Today is a free day, so eat what you wish. Try to listen to your body and only eat if you are hungry. Allow your self one treat, but keep it in moderation. No other junk foods or bad foods allowed except your treat. Try to keep the treat or dessert <b>under 350</b></div>
Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-55075279639290762512014-07-26T22:35:00.001-05:002014-07-26T22:35:11.159-05:00I'm so Melodramatic <br />
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Step right up!</div>
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Binge and Purge, Starve and carve.</div>
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Walk away slowly, </div>
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only to come running back.</div>
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Clinging to the bars.</div>
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Standing at the gates of this demented carnival,</div>
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The freak show </div>
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Life.</div>
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Sucked in by the merry go round of thoughts,</div>
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whirling,</div>
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spinning out of</div>
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control.</div>
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The games are crooked.</div>
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The fun house mirrors lie.</div>
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Silly girl,</div>
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You know the real magic lies </div>
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behind the curtain</div>
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Beckoning forward with grin and bending finger</div>
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But wait! </div>
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There's a price if you'd like to see inside. </div>
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It must be written in the flesh.</div>
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I pay with my soul.</div>
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The temptation irresistible.</div>
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I want to levitate. </div>
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Please,</div>
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saw me in half.</div>
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Make me disappear before their eyes. </div>
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You'll have me swallowing swords and spitting fire.</div>
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Come one come all!</div>
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See the amazing shrinking girl!</div>
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The bearded lady's got nothing on me.</div>
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Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-42112714233584734132014-07-15T12:58:00.001-05:002014-07-15T12:58:07.186-05:00The Lighter Side<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Yesterday, me and the BF were in bed, him on top, and all of the sudden he stops and goes ,<i>Ah!, </i>like he's in pain. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I asked what was wrong, and he got this big smile and said, <i>you're so skinny, your hipbone stabbed me!</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I responded with an apology, huge smile on my face. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><i>Don't be, </i>he said with a wink, still smiling hard.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I Love Him</span></div>
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<img height="338" src="http://s2.favim.com/orig/37/black-and-white-thin-thinspo-Favim.com-302211.jpg" width="400" /></div>
Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-85057714921637407792014-07-04T21:48:00.001-05:002014-07-04T21:48:49.777-05:00Skip Dinner, Wake up Thinner<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Isn't it crazy how easy it is to skip breakfast and lunch, but then dinner and beyond is torture? I'm making myself a little thinspo post to keep my mind on the right track so I wake up empty. I need to start posting my intake again. That way I can be shamed away from eating.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Breakfast: Weight control oatmeal (160)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"> Coffee/cream(50)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Snack: Baguette (150)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Lunch: Banana chips/dehydrated strawberry mix (200)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"> Probiotic trail mix (150)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"> Cottage cheese w/ berries (130)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Dinner: Water (0)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Total: 840 :( Better than 900, right?</span></div>
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<img alt="Has She Been Eating?" height="320" src="http://media-cache-cd0.pinimg.com/736x/da/e5/f4/dae5f41b0e7f9f59dd879733f7b67826.jpg" width="206" /></div>
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<img alt=":)" height="400" src="http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/f5/12/94/f51294f9a7273a2eb988fe93672dce8a.jpg" width="309" /></div>
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<img alt="I'll stop when i'm thin i promise." height="213" src="http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/69/e6/ba/69e6baa8b74212e6891cce52eb1d5e14.jpg" width="320" /></div>
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<img alt="I wish.." height="194" src="http://media-cache-cd0.pinimg.com/736x/33/ad/11/33ad11dffe996127da9827db8215e112.jpg" width="200" /></div>
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<img alt=" " height="320" src="http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/13/ea/69/13ea692ccc55872f9bd7b20f13f564a3.jpg" width="318" /></div>
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<img alt="tumblr_mkv2tuaimX1s3xaz5o1_250.jpg (250×328)" src="http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/79/ae/6d/79ae6df257fd7c238fbd0d8ac1069a5b.jpg" /></div>
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<img alt="#beautiful #proana" height="320" src="http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/a7/28/a7/a728a70576f80b67b3bed15e2ca66eb5.jpg" width="226" /></div>
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Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-83403946642554033772014-07-04T16:34:00.000-05:002014-07-04T16:34:25.479-05:00Whisper, Whisper<div style="text-align: center;">
<img src="http://i1.ytimg.com/vi/SInryXSPI-Q/hqdefault.jpg" /></div>
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<br /></div>
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There's a boy at work, a few years younger than me, that has the hots for me. He's cute and all, but very obnoxious and immature at times. I'm not interested. He certainly is, and he wants to know all about me, asking things like, " Are you ok? Did you eat today? What did you eat? Does that mean you really didn't eat?" He knows nothing about my ED stuff, and he's already suspicious. Probably from the time he stole my phone at work to look at my pics and saw all the thigh gap/ rib shot pics I take in the mirror. </div>
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<br /></div>
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The girls at work don't ask me, but rather ask each other about me, and wonder if they should believe their eyes. "Is she losing weight? Does she look thinner to you?" Good thing our work uniforms are pretty concealing. They've got no proof :)</div>
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In honor of the 4th of July and our independence , I am freeing myself from the scales and from calories for a week. I will be allowed family dinner on Sunday evening and a small, under 300 cal something before Gymnastics practice so I have energy not to faint. I want someone to outright ask me if I've lost weight. On July 11, a very special day :), I will be at 123. </div>
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We can achieve amazing things with a sheer will to resist, stars in our eyes, and an empty tummy at bed time.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Question: What is the most magical thing about summer to you?</div>
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For me, it's being part of "The Wave" at a baseball game. Idk why but seeing it come together successfully gives me such a good feeling, and brings a sparkle to my eye lol</div>
<br />Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-2281089334355485612014-06-09T11:13:00.003-05:002014-06-09T11:13:36.256-05:00Disbelief<div style="text-align: center;">
I've never really been able to maintain my weight loss like this before. Usually I'll drop 5, put on 2, drop 3, put on 4, drop 2... Get the picture? It's maddening really. I suffer and push myself for days to get results, only to give in, have a massive junk binge, and be left frustrated and disappointed in myself. I've been restricting like crazy, but still enjoying treats. I'm letting myself each pretty much anything besides a lot of refined sugar, but in tiny portions. </div>
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<br /></div>
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Here's what I ate yesterday:</div>
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Breakfast~ a handful of raspberries, a small handful of Kashi shredded wheat cereal dry, and peppermint tea</div>
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Lunch~ a few salad croutons, a Quaker granola bar</div>
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Snack~ 7 circus peanut candies, 4 salt water taffies</div>
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Dinner~ Cauliflower, a pork steak, two rib tips</div>
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Dessert~ 40 cal fudge pop, a handful of unsalted peanuts</div>
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I know that all sounds horrible, but Sunday I let up a little because I have to visit my family, and have family dinner. I told my dad yesterday that I needed to buy new work pants, because I've been using the same ones for quite a while, and they are falling off of me ( US size 7) I can pull the waist on these babies like 4 inches. I work at a restaurant, and we have to wear black pant, black pants, black shoes, black everything. I told him I thought that the pants were probably super worn and stretched out from being worn 4 days a week for the past few years. He then responded with, " I think it's because you've dropped a ton of weight."</div>
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Of course I responded with this gem, " No I haven't! I've just tightened up a lot from working out." Crisis averted lol I need to start being careful about what I talk about. No more drawing attention to my weight loss. I always want to point it out to people to see if they notice. The good thing is, I always tell people I weigh 127 since I started high school. Little do they know, I was actually up at 143 at one point...</div>
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Even after all that crap yesterday, I still weighed in 126.6 :D BMI 19.2!</div>
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I can't wait until my bmi is in the 18 range, but I have to be under 125 for that to happen</div>
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Once I get there I'll post more pics</div>
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<3 Sunshine</div>
Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6765151339392862810.post-52163672123958525132014-05-29T13:26:00.001-05:002014-05-29T13:26:26.322-05:00New Body, Almost Finished<b>Here I am at 127 the other day. I'll post more pics once I get under 125 :) What do you think?</b><br />
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Sunshinechildhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16360285497138144764noreply@blogger.com3